Everyone's moving on..

Everyone is moving on, to better steps, to a better life and to a better future. Honestly, I am just stuck here, from step 1, except now, I feel even more alone.

I feel alone every single day, night, time. Everyone is now engaged to someone and has no more time for me. Even the way they reply and respond back to me is totally different from the normal conversations we have. Tbh, when i wanted to talk to someone about this, I literally could not turn to anyone because I have no one left. I cannot think of anyone who cares enough about me and can really understand what I feel. 

With all these that are happening, I finally understand why they say after highschool, we really do part ways. Friends will meet new people, and those new people would be another step to another life. Honestly, to me, I feel like everyone would change eventually. Why would people even want to look back?

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another story,

I felt so foolish and embarrassed to have thought that all of this would have worked out or even someone might have feelings for me. I know that no one else would ever have feelings for me taking into account my looks, and my features. Why did I even think of myself so highly? Why did I even have confidence in the first place? It just made me look like a fool. I cannot believe I even let myself to think something like that was possible. What a shameful thought.. 

I hate how everyone is slowly leaving, since the beginning of the year. All my close friends getting into a relationship and then forgetting those who mattered to them alot and forgetting those who were there for them when they needed someone. 

It's not that I don't want to move on from episodes of highschool, I really really do want to, but... I just don't seem to make progress.

What hurts the most is thinking that we could forever be attached to each other, forever be happy and having countless joyful memories together. Not in bf gf way, but as friends. I thought our friendship would last a lifetime, forever, actually, but from the looks of it, it is already slowly breaking apart. I can just feel and see it eventhough it has just been a short while.

I miss everyone,

Ai Win.

Thinking about all these just makes me ache more. I wish that I wouldn't have to feel anything.